Donate any amount one time
Monthly subscription of $33.33 a month recurring.

Powered by Squarespace

Tanked Episode 287 for Feb. 11, 2014



- Beer/Mixed Drinks

- Weekend Catchup

- Olympics have made me a lazy guy. Bob Costas Eye.

- Happy Valentine’s day, Lets spill the beans on what we got our partners.


- Bloody Valentine



- Crab Revenge


-McGruff the Crime Dog may have always told kids to "take a bite out of crime," but apparently the actor who played him took a big bite into crime: John Morales has been sentenced to 16 year in prison for amassing large stashes of drugs and weapons.



 Skweezme, The Netflix Of Porn, May Just Save The Adult Film Industry

Nobody pays for porn anymore, and with so much of it available for free on the Internet, why should they? Pornhub, Redtube and Tube8, among other services, have basically decimated what was once a thriving industry. Piracy has crushed DVD sales (which are down by about half), one estimate has it that 80 percent of porn companies were ran out of business (or nearly so) during the recession, and even the porn that still exists has suffered from budget cutbacks. If someone doesn’t prop up the industry, then fewer porn will be made, and all you bastards will be stuck watching the same furries for the rest of your lives.

Enter Skweezme (link VERY NSFW), the Netflix of porn.


Why make the switch? Because the streaming service contains no annoying ads, nor poses any threats of malware. There are no membership fees, Plus, with a huge catalog, you have easy access to original and studio content that can scratch, uh, any fetish itch. And yes: In order to brand itself better, Skweezme is coming out with its own original series described as The Real Housewives of San Fernando Valley. Plus, it’s only a dollar, and wouldn’t you feel better about yourself if you were actually supporting the Bavarian actors who helped you take care of your, uh, business?



iPhones with Flappy Bird Pre-Installed Hit ebay with Bids Hitting $89,000

The seller of an Apple iPhone 5s that came with popular mobile game Flappy Bird installed claims EBay took down the sale of the device.

The device had gained 74 bids and was listed at $99,900. The item still had six days left before the auction closed, but it was removed around mid-day Monday.

"EBay took it down. They said that you can't sell phones with apps. Which doesn't make sense to me because every iPhone has apps and they sell millions of them on EBay," Vasil Kiniv, the seller of the device, told The Times in a message.


Another user who was selling a smartphone with Flappy Bird installed claims EBay also removed his item. The seller, whose name is David Syrett, said he received an email from the company explaining why his device was removed.

"Smartphones and tablets must be restored to factory settings before they are allowed to be sold on EBay," the email said. "Please remove all content from your device, including the game Flappy Bird, before you attempt to list your item again."


Syrett's device was a 16-gigabyte iPhone 5. He listed it with a starting price of $2,499 and said it was viewed six times before EBay removed it.


Users began selling devices with Flappy Bird installed after the developer of the game suddenly removed it from both the Apple App Store and Google Play this weekend. Before being removed, Flappy Bird was listed as the top free game on both app stores.,0,3924898.story#ixzz2symE3Q00



Flappy Birds


The saga of Flappy Bird, the notoriously frustrating game by .GEARS that rocketed to the top of iTunes last month, has come to a mysterious end.

On Saturday, Dong Nguyen, the game’s developer, tweeted that he planned to remove Flappy Bird from iTunes. “I am sorry 'Flappy Bird' users,” Dong wrote on Twitter, “22 hours from now, I will take 'Flappy Bird' down. I cannot take this anymore.”

The game has since been pulled from iTunes.

Dong’s tweet may be a reference to speculation that bots were used to artificially boost the game’s download ranking in iTunes.

For months after Flappy Bird was released in May, it performed poorly. Then, in November, it, and several other .GEARS titles began to climb the ranks of the iTunes store. On January 17, Flappy Bird reached number one.

At its peak, the game was reportedly pulling in as much as $50,000 a day in ad revenue, according to Time. More info in the link



 Scott and Ric Reviews the Lego Movie

Phil Lord, Christopher Miller 21jump street directors

Scott Reviews The Lego Movie

Chris Pratt is the voice of Emmit

Elizebeth Banks is the voice of Wild style

Will ferrel is the voice of Lord Buisiness

Morgon Freeman is the voice of Vitruvius the hippy sage

IMDB cast credits


An ordinary LEGO minifigure, mistakenly thought to be the extraordinary MasterBuilder, is recruited to join a quest to stop an evil LEGO tyrant from gluing the universe together.


-The pace

-The story

-The humor

-The Animation

-The voices

-The final act is strikingly emotional. did not expect.


Tarzan to swing back into theaters in 2016

Warner Bros. has set a 2016 date for ‘Tarzan’, as directed by David Yates (Harry Potter) and starring Alexander Skarsgård (True Blood).


Age of Ultron starts shooting today

Rumor has it that the first 10 minutes of the movie will be in Johannesburg, South Africa. Rumor is film’s secondary villains and newcomers Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch will be introduced. Age of Ultron will also be shooting at locations in Italy and Korea.


Casting the Eventual Rob Ford Movie

You don't earn a reputation as the crack smoking, cunnilinging mayor of the fourth largest city in North America without your story getting optioned for a movie, or at least a TV movie. And so, the Rob Ford movie gets cast.

Last week, Toronto Star journalist Robyn Doolittle released Crazy Town, her book about the never-ending saga of Toronto mayor Rob Ford, his family, and the kingdom in which they have come to rule. Less than seven days later, Blue Ice Pictures, a Toronto production company, scooped up the movie and TV rights for the book, at least in Canada. It's not a large, well known operation — their biggest credit is Sarah Polley's 2006 movie Away From Her — but the news signals that by the time this story plays itself out and Rob Ford leaves office, one way or another, the Toronto mayor's story will more than likely make its to the big screen in America.



Shea Labuf shows up at a red carpet with a bag over his face saying “I’m not famous anymore” What a turd.


Follow Ric on


Ric’s YouTube page


Fat-Asses of the World Unite! Unite behind your new leader Fry Dog!! Follow blindly and faithfully. For he is the only one to fill your tummy with righteousness.

I blame this mutation on the Korean War. When meat was scarce in the years during and after the war, Koreans made do with whatever they could scavenge from the surplus from the US armed forces bases – Spam and hotdogs



Ice JJ Fish Best (worst) rapper/R&B ever?

According to the YouTube description of "On The Floor," singer Ice JJ Fish is "comparable to the second coming of Jesus.. maybe even 2pac?"

We'll let you go ahead and be the judge of who Fish is the reincarnation of after seeing Fish's mind-blowingly terrible (and terribly hilarious) anthem, courtesy of







Police respond to report of armed man in banana suit

BEAUMONT, Texas, Feb. 11 (UPI) --

Police in Texas said they responded to a report

of a man in a banana costume with an AK-47 at the

side of a road and found a man promoting a nearby

gun store.


Beaumont police said they responded to a street corner

in the city on a report of a man in a banana costume

holding an AK-47 and they arrived to find an 18-year-old

wearing the costume and directing people to nearby store

Golden Triangle Tactical with the assault rifle hanging across

his back,


KBMT-TV, Beaumont, reported Tuesday.


The man was temporarily detained and cited for violating

a city ordinance banning soliciting alongside roadways,

police said. They said further charges are possible related

to the man's display of the firearm.

Derek Poe, owner of the store, said the man was hired

to bring in business as part of the shop's grand opening.

Poe's store used to be located in the Parkdale Mall and he

was stopped by police in December while carrying a rifle on

his back inside the mall. He said he moved his store when

the mall posted signs explaining the facility's ban on

carrying weapons.


Woman shot into McDonald's due to missing bacon

GRAND RAPIDS, Mich., Feb. 11 (UPI) --

Police in Michigan said a woman accused of firing

a gun into a McDonald's because her sandwich lacked

bacon left her phone number with an employee.


Authorities said Shaneka Monique Torres, 29, was a

passenger in a car going through a McDonald's drive-through

in Grand Rapids early Monday. She left her phone number with

an employee at the first drive-through window after flirting

with him,


WOOD-TV, Grand Rapids, reported Tuesday.


However, Torres apparently became angry at the

second window when she and the other woman found

their order was wrong, police said. The police report said

Torres, whose sandwich lacked the bacon she ordered,

then fired a gun through the closed window of the car and

the round went into the drive-through window and

crossed through the building without hitting anyone.


Police said employees did not realize there had been a

shooting at first and thought a coffee pot had exploded.

Torres was tracked down at her home using the phone

number she left for the worker, police said.


She was arraigned Monday in Grand Rapids District Court

on charges of carrying a concealed weapon,

discharge of a firearm in or at a building and felony firearms.

She was jailed in lieu of $50,000 bond.


Australian teen accused of using chainsaw to rob gas station while wearing flowerpot

IPSWICH, Australia, Feb. 11 (UPI) --

An Australian teen apparently didn’t have time

to invest in a ski mask before allegedly trying to

rob a gas station, so he went with the next best thing --

a flowerpot.


Steven Frank Steele is accused of using a chainsaw

to rob a 7-Eleven service station in Ipswich while

wearing a flowerpot on his head to conceal his identity.

Steele allegedly entered the establishment while he was drunk

and holding a running chainsaw.


The store’s two attendants fled into a back room and

police say Steele used the chainsaw to damage a window

and several display racks. The teen then exposed his buttocks

to the employees and left the store after taking a bottle of soda.


A police officer responding to the scene spotted Steele walking

down the street and he was placed under arrest.

The chainsaw was found in a bush near the service station.


The teen was charged with one count of armed robbery,

two counts of willful damage, one count of going armed to

cause fear, one count of public nuisance and one count of

possessing suspected stolen property. He will remain in custody

until the case is heard again March 3.

Restaurant owner fires shot at customer after complaint about egg roll is reporting that a restaurant owner in

Birmingham, Alabama fired a gunshot at a customer

who had the gall to complain about a cockroach in her food.


In the early evening of February 6, at the now ironically named

Good Friend Chinese and Seafood, mother Jatari Walker

complained to restaurant owner ChunHin Ching, about a bug

she had found in her egg roll.


WVTM Alabama’s 13 News reports that


the owner and customer argued until Mr. Ching relented

and gave Ms. Walker her money back. This story should

end here, but sadly it doesn’t. The 52-year-old restaurateur then

grabbed a gun and fired it in her direction. He was arrested and

has been charged with attempted murder.


WBRC Fox 6 News reports that


those living on the west side of Birmingham aren’t entirely happy

with what happened. The West End Manor Neighborhood Association

has begun a protest and boycott of the restaurant, holding signs that

are both clever and chilling, like “If the food doesn’t kill, the owner might.”

City councilor Sheila Tyson told the neighborhood association that

she is working to keep the restaurant closed while police

investigate the incident.


Let’s not forget the whole bug inside the egg roll part of the equation.

Ms. Tyson also told WBRC Fox 6 News that the

Jefferson County Health Department will be visiting

Good Friend Chinese and Seafood at some point this week for an

inspection. The news station has tried to speak with Chun Hin Ching

to get his side of the story, but have not been able to reach him as of yet.

We took a look at online reviews of the eatery, but there aren’t enough to

fully gauge how well liked it was before February 6.


As for Jatari Walker, she’s grateful to be alive yet is still haunted by the

moment, telling WVTM, “I was scared. I was just thinking about life, my baby,

everything…my family…everything.”