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Tanked Episode 282 for Jan. 07, 2013



- Beer/Mixed Drinks

- What we’ve been up to for for two weeks!

-Madness at the local michigan grocery stores. Shelves emptied for Snowpocolypse.

-I was rear ended by an asian lady. go figure.


this was found on craigslist missed connections:

A Woman on Craigslist Is Looking For the Stranger She Kissed on New Year's Eve . . . Even Though He Did Something Nasty During Their Kiss?


It read like this:

We kissed at midnight then you ran away! - w4m - 25 (Downtown)

You - 5'8 scruffy, glasses, wearing a blue hoodie outside the Vid and I asked you for a lighter. You lit my cigarette and we talked about our wishes for the new year. We heard the countdown starting and decided to stay outside. I started to cry and you kissed me, and then we started to make out. After a minute I felt something warm and realised that you pissed yourself. I pushed you away and that's when you ran but I wish you had stayed. You peed on me but it's OK! I just want to know who you are! Please reply and when you do tell me why I started crying so I know it's you - if you remember.








Anheuser-Busch is a fairly litigious company.  The world’s largest brewery has sued various small businesses over the smallest resemblance “Bud” in a name.  Now the brewery finds itself sued by a craft brewery, Big Sky.

Recently, AB launched a new ad campaign featuring the voice of John Krasinski, best known as “Jim Halpert” from NBC’s The Office tv show. The online only videos feature various funny scenarios with the tagline “Hold My Beer.”

Big Sky contends that this has been part of their branding since 2004.


AB issued a response to the lawsuit, contending that the phrase isn’t something that can truly be trademarked.


“These humorous Bud Light videos explore the unexpected things that could happen when you ask someone to hold your beer,” said Rob McCarthy, vice president of Bud Light marketing. “There is no trademark use of the phrase ‘Hold my beer and watch this,’ nor is there intent to create any association with Big Sky. Countless other videos and jokes use the same or similar words as a punch line or hashtag.”


Big Sky out of montana said this on their website: “Our property line falls along the use of “Hold my beer and watch this”, but only when it refers to beer/alcohol.  We drove this fence post in 2004 and have been using it ever since. Anyone that is not related to the alcohol industry is free to use this saying at their pleasure.” They say it’s trademarked.


Looks like this one is going to court. Below is an example of the Budweiser “Hold My Beer” videos.






Callin' Oates: The Hotline You Don't Need (But Might Call Anyway)


pick up your phone and call 719-26-OATES (2837)— at least as of this writing — you'll get a computerized woman's voice telling you what numbers to press to hear one of four Hall & Oates songs.

The question, of course, is ... why?


Put any movies you saw over the christmas break here. 

-Scott Saw Saving Mr. Banks.

Follow Ric on


Ric’s YouTube page


True Facts About The Armadillo






Choosy mugger declines opportunity to steal old cell phone.


Beggars can’t be choosers, but apparently crooks can.

The New York Post writes that an armed mugger

decided he didn’t want the, “3-year-old generation

Windows phone” he had been handed and gave it back

to his victim, 25-year-old Brooklyn resident Kevin Cook.


The mugging, perpetrated by two unidentified men,

took place in Central Park after midnight on Friday evening.

It was certainly a frightening one. According to an

earlier report by the Post, the armed suspects threatened

the lives of Kevin and his friend, who did hand over a

briefcase, debit and credit cards, a passport, and $113 in cash.


However, Mr. Cook does get to keep his cell,

as the thief was not impressed with 2010 LG Quantum

mobile phone, apparently. Cook told the Post,

“Once hesaw my phone, he looked at it like,

‘What the f*** is this?’ and gave it back to me.”

Cook told 1010 WINS CBS New York News,

“I just assumed that he couldn’t make any money off of it.

So he handed it back to me and a minute later I was able

to call 911 and get the whole thing started.”

Police have not yet caught the robbers,

and are asking anyone with information regarding

the crime to call them at (800) 577-TIPS.

More info: New York Post, 1010 WINS


Gunman waits patiently before robbing a CVS

Odd News turns its gaze back to our favorite state - Florida.

The Sun Sentinel is reporting on a robber who waited patiently

to rob a CVS in Pompano Beach, and was so calm and quiet

about it that customers continued shopping around him,

unaware they were witnesses to a holdup.


The crook, who is yet to be identified, walked into the

pharmacy earlier this month, proceeded to show a gun and

demanded money from a young clerk. The employee told the

gunman that she needed to check with her manager first.

Amazingly, the man waited for the manager to come to the

front of the store, and even hung around as the cashier helped

ring up an actual customer.


WSVN 7 News reports that the store manager finally showed up

and then was shown the gun and given the same demand for

the money. However, he and the gunman then had to wait

for the aforementioned customer’s order to be taken care of.

The customer walked away with his purchased items,

then the thief got his money.


It seems it was all pretty low-key.

The station spoke with Broward Sherriff’s Office spokesperson

Dani Moschella, who told the station, “He was fairly calm.

It's likely no one else in the store even knew that he was armed.

” Police are asking anyone with useful information

regarding the matter to call them at 954-493-TIPS.

More info: Sun Sentinel, WSVN

Andrew Frey, Man 'High On Meth, Fights Off 15 Police Officers While Masturbating'


A man who was allegedly high on meth reportedly fought off

more than a dozen police officers while publicly masturbating.

Andrew Frey, 37, apparently made a series of outbursts and

then began masturbating in an Oregon restaurant, The Oregonian reports.

Incredibly, police were reportedly unable to subdue Frey with a Taser.

It took 15 officers to finally take him into custody and stop

him pleasuring himself.


Frey later reportedly told authorities that he took methamphetamine

and couldn’t remember the obscene incident, according to

the Marion County Sheriff's office.

Frey was treated at a local hospital and then booked

into county jail on charges of public indecency, theft of services,

and resisting arrest.

Naked man woke neighbors, slapped deputy


LUTZ — Neighbors woke up at the crack of dawn Saturday, deputies say, to Morris Reynolds' voice. They looked up the street to see him in front of a home, jumping up and down, stark naked.


One neighbor called 911. When a deputy arrived at 1869 Tinsmith Circle, a Pasco sheriff's report states, Reynolds, 25, squared off against him, shouting and cussing. As Deputy Bryan Mobley grabbed his radio to call for backup, Reynolds lunged and slapped the deputy in the face with both hands "using maximum force," according to the report.

Reynolds tried to grab Mobley around his middle. The two struggled until Mobley was able to loop a handcuff on Reynolds' wrist. Another deputy arrived and was able to cuff Reynolds' other hand.


Reynolds, of 11731 Elm St. in San Antonio, was arrested on charges of battery on a law enforcement officer, disorderly conduct and resisting an officer with violence. He was released from the Land O'Lakes jail Sunday on $10,000 bail.


Wife Stabs Husband With Ceramic Squirrel Over Beer


A South Carolina couple was in the middle of chaos while the rest of us were getting ready to ring in the new year. Police showed up to the home of Helen Ann Williams, 44, on December 30, at 12:20 a.m, where they found a 41-year-old man covered in blood from chest and facial lacerations, according to UPI.

The man told authorities that his wife got enraged when he returned home without beer because the store was closed, and used a ceramic squirrel to beat him over the head and stab him.

However, the wife had a different story. She claimed her husband fell and cut himself and that the blood she had on her hand and clothes had already been there.


The police took her into custody and the man was treated at a hospital.

This had to be deeper than beer though. Seriously?