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Wednesday
Nov202013

Tanked Episode 277 for Tues. Nov. 19, 2013

 ANNOUNCEMENTS 

 

- Beer/Mixed Drinks

- Weekend Catchup

- Aaron’s birthday

- Florida awards, top 8 and who is moving on.

Mayor Rob Ford is the Greatest Mayor of all time.

Fail Compilation

YouTube

 

More than enough to eat.  Start clip at 1:27

YouTube





BoOzE NEWS

A drink that gets you drunk without the alcohol or hangover

 

Professor David Nutt, a scientist who chaired the Government’s Advisory Council, is seeking investment for his work at Imperial College, London, into the development of a substance that replicates the effect of alcohol.

Professor Nutt is working on a prototype for synthetic alcohol. A small liquid shot would give the same lift as a few drinks after work but without the unpleasant side-effects or health issues presented by alcohol. Those enjoying its benefits could then take an antidote before driving home and there would be no hangover or damage to the liver. The synthetic alcohol works on the nerves in the brain which relax people. Instead of getting drunk they stay in a mild state of inebriation.

Nutt says that the substance can have the same pleasant effect as alcohol minus the harm and is suggesting that it could slash Britain’s binge drinking epidemic, which currently costs the NHS £3billion a year, and reduce the number of deaths from alcohol poisoning. He claims it would get rid of liver cirrhosis, stomach ulcers, cardiac problems and a large number of the toxic effects of alcohol.




Professor Nutt reports that he has a partial alternative tested on volunteers but with Government backing and further clinical trials, the first ever synthetic alcohol could be available in three to five years time. He is seeking funding to advance his project as to date the project has been hard to progress. Some people find the whole concept too radical.££ Selling the substance would present its own problems as it would probably have to be classified as a drug and consequently falls foul of the drug laws and alcohol manufacturers would also probably protest and want it banned.

BoozeNews.com



 VIDEO GAMES 

 

PS4 launched last friday.

 

Sony shared the news over the weekend that in the space of 24 hours, over a million PS4s were sold in North America, putting Sony well on track for the most successful games console launch in recent history, if not all time. Comparing it to other console launches reveals that the games industry is playing in a whole new league now than it was at the dawn of the last console generation. It’s greatly encouraging news – and not just for Sony.

 

To put this in perspective, The Wii (until now the fastest selling console) sold over 1 million in its first few days, but that was across the world. PS4 did that in North America alone!

 

Nonetheless, the first-day figure tells us a lot. Comparing the PS4 launch to others in recent history makes it clear just how much the gaming audience has expanded in the past 8 years. It would seem, from this evidence, that the demand for gaming consoles has never been higher, at least amongst early adopters. The PS3 launched with an insane price tag and a distinct absence of gamer goodwill, two things that the PS4 has on its side this time around, and sold 197,000 units in its first week on sale in the US. That is a ridiculously gigantic difference. Based on that number, the PS4 may well have sold 10 times what the PS3 did on its first day. The Xbox 360, meanwhile, sold 326,000 in its first two weeks when it launched

 

We’ll have a clearer picture of PS4’s launch sales after the first month, by which point it will have launched in most territories.

 

Also XboNE launches this Friday. My insiders say the presale numbers are not looking good for the XbONE. At my local Game Stop 1,200 PS4 pre orders vs. 20 for XbONE. Say Wha?

 

Im not getting one until some actual games come out Spring 2014’s gigantic releases like Titanfall, Destiny, Infamous and Watch Dogs

IGN




 MOVIES 

 

Guillermo del Toro's Vampire TV Series ‘The Strain’ Gets A Full Season Order At FX!

 

Star Wars release date Dec. 18th 2014

 

Thor Review:

(Scott saw too)

 

New to DVD this week

World’s End

We’re the Millers

 

Catching Fire opens friday night:

 

Follow Ric on

www.facebook.com/ricmulligan

Twitter https://twitter.com/ricmulligan

Ric’s YouTube page youtube.com/user/ricmulligan



 FOOD BEATING 

 

***Ric and Aaron I need a vote from you guys. Do either one of these stories count as a food beating?***

 

Good evening boys,

 

Please enjoy the attached story for your consideration.  My apologies if it has already been on the show. As you read this you will see it is  actually 2 food stories.




Food fight: Victim bludgeoned with tub of imitation butter

By Michael Harthorne Published: Aug 27, 2013 at 10:26 AM PST

SEATTLE -- In an incident that contains all the illegality of regular assault but with 70 percent less saturated fat, a wheelchair-bound man was bludgeoned with a tub of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter! last Wednesday in South Lake Union. According to the Seattle Police Department's report, the victim, who lives in a shelter in the 1800 block of Eastlake Avenue, was confronted by another resident, who accused the victim of having his television turned up too loud. The suspect repeatedly hit the victim over the head with a 16-ounce tub of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!, according to the report. Officers arrived to find the victim covered in the imitation butter. According to the report, the suspect told officers he poured the fake butter on the victim but denied hitting him with the tub.The suspect was arrested and booked into King County Jail. Speaking of food fights, a 52-year-old woman was arrested Saturday on suspicion of covering an International District restaurant's customers, including a baby, with soy sauce and chocolate milk. According to police, the woman entered Dim Sum King around 1 p.m. and told everyone inside to go back to China. After flipping over some plates, the woman spit on a man and squirted him and his baby with soy sauce before spraying other customers with a container of chocolate milk she was carrying, according to police. When officers arrived, the woman reportedly slapped one of them in the arm. She was arrested and booked into King County Jail for investigation of harassment and assaulting an officer.

Looking forward to the next show,

Stacy from CA

"MadBilly's" wife        (we shall call her MadStacy)

PS. He does not know I've submitted a story.  He would be shocked to hear you guys mention my name.




 WEB GEM 

 

Hot Chick unleashes Super Burp.

YouTube

 

Japan is Fucked up. Orgasm Wars

YouTube

 

Anyone remember the game show "Make Me Laugh," in which comedians tried to make contestants giggle within a time limit? Well, this is a "make me climax" variation: A gay man tries to bring a straight man to orgasm against his will.

The jokey segment was called "Orgasm Wars," and it aired on late-night Japanese TV.

Dramatically narrated, it featured straight Japanese porn star Ryou Sawai meeting his "opponent," Takuya, in a warehouse. They exchange boasts of who will win and then get down to business. Takuya performs oral sex on the porn star but all the graphic action takes place discreetly in a covered box. Takuya has 40 minutes to finish the job as university students cheer on the contestants. (Quite the field trip.)

 

 

 ODD NEWS 

 

Goodness Gracious… Great BALLS of FIRE!

cue music Jerry Lee Lewis - Great Balls of Fire


Police in Chicago say a man who caught another man in bed with his girlfriend decided to teach him a "lesson" by setting his balls on fire.

According to the official police report, the unidentified suspect arrived at his girlfriend's apartment Monday afternoon to find her and the victim in flagrante delicto.

The attacker then knocked his rival unconscious and pulled out a Bic lighter, which the police say was set on "high."

"This will be a lesson to you, I lit your [genitals] on fire," the suspected reportedly told the still-unconscious victim.

Officers were called to a nearby laundromat, where they found the victim rubbing Vaseline on his burns.

He was subsequently transported to the burn unit at the University of Chicago Hospital following a brief stay at Holy Cross Hospital.

The Chicago Tribune reports that none of the parties involved were taken into custody.






The End All Be All Of Florida Stories



Holy fuck this would win automaticly in the Florida Awards

 

In Florida, there are violent people, naked people, poopers and masturbators -- but rarely is one man the total package.

When Tony and LaDonna Land discovered naked carnival worker Gregory Matthew Bruni on their roof, the night had just begun. Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North Fort Myers Home, and then defecated and masturbated inside the house, WTSP reports.

The Lands told police they were in their bedroom at around 7 p.m. Monday when they heard a noise that sounded like thunder, according to Fox 4 Now. Tony went outside and says he saw Bruni on top of the roof, completely naked. Bruni allegedly jumped down on top of Land, ABC 7 reported, then knocked him over by hitting him in the shoulder.

The Lands say Bruni ran into the house, pulled a big-screen TV off the wall, and spilled the contents of a vacuum onto the floor. Around this time, LaDonna grabbed a gun and began firing at the nude intruder. She missed, and the couple called 911.

"I don't know who the hell he is -- he's naked and he ran into my damn house," Tony can be heard saying on the recording.

The Lands told authorities that after shots were fired, Bruni began whacking the mole in their living room before heading into their son's bedroom to rub some clothing on his face.

When deputies arrived, they attempted to control Bruni, who they say was wildly flailing around and speaking nonsensically. They also discovered that Bruni had defecated on the floor in two spots within the home.

   

At some point during the ruckus, investigators say, Bruni sucked up the contents of the vacuum, then spit it back out.

Bruni was taken into custody and transported to a hospital for evaluation, where doctors reportedly told deputies they planned to conduct tests to determine "what Bruni was on."

Bruni has been charged with criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary

 

Recap:

-Naked on Roof

-Squirrel jumped off of said roof

-Hit a Dude

-Broke into house

-Ripped TV off of wall

-Dodged Bullets

-Masturbates in front of victims

-Rubbed Clothing on face

-Pooped twice in their home

-Ate contents of a vacume

 

Authorities: Burglary suspect wore GPS ankle monitor




LAKEWOOD, Colo., Nov. 19 (UPI) --

Police in Colorado said they busted a burglary suspect

accused of stealing from houses while wearing a GPS

monitoring ankle bracelet.

 

District Attorney George Brauchler said

 

Brandon Campbell, 27, was wearing the GPS device as a

condition probation for another case when he allegedly

burglarized 15 homes in Lakewood and Greenwood Village,

 

KCNC-TV, Denver, reported Tuesday.

 

"I don't think that there's any doubt at all that this guy is the

last guy picked on the prison Brain Bowl team," Brauchler said.

 

Deputy Prosecutor Chelsea Koch said

the ankle monitor was present at every one of the alleged burglaries.

"I would say it's a prosecutor's dream to have GPS,"

Koch said. "That's an excellent piece of evidence to put him at

every single burglary at the time it was burglarized."

 

KCNC-TV said Koch was on probation for a case involving

the attempted theft of a navigation GPS device.




Thieves took $50,000 worth of Red Bull from Florida warehouse

                           

MEDLEY, Fla., Nov. 19 (UPI) --

Police in Florida said thieves made off with about

$500,000 worth of Red Bull energy drinks being

stored at a warehouse.

 

The Medley Police Department said workers at OHL Inc.

last saw the nearly 100 pallets of energy drinks in the

evening Nov. 9 and the beverages were missing when they

arrived the evening of Nov. 11 and discovered the doors were

unlocked,

 

the Miami Herald reported Tuesday.

 

Detective Lourdes Muniz said

 

the thieves are believed to have had inside knowledge of

the warehouse as they apparently had a key to get in and

knew how to disconnect the alarm system.

 

Muniz said

 

there were no security cameras in use during the time of the burglary.



Florida Re-cap

1 vs 2 winner is 2 Poops in yard, Naked in Pool

 

3 vs 4 winner is 4 Scott Barron Allegedly Masturbates At Sailboats, Claims He's Exercising

 

5 vs 6 winner is 6 Fla. Siblings Charged With Stealing Frito-Lay Chips From Factory

 

7 vs 8 winner is 8 Kimberly Womack Blocks McDonalds Drive-thru, Demands Free Food

 

9 vs 10 winner is 10 Samurai-sword wielding man was angry about shrimp

 

11 vs 12 winner is 12 Rubbed feces on the woman's back

 

13 vs 14 winner is 14 Loose baggy pants foil Florida church robbery suspect's getaway

 

15 vs 16 winner is 15 Florida Man, 51, Arrested For Chicken Wing Assault On Wife